As a young child, I was often seen as weird or “different” than the rest. I would see things or figures no one can see… at age 5, I knew what herbs or plants would cure certain ailments. And boy, did I have a lot of imaginary friends!
My teen years were quite normal. I had crushes and boyfriends. I enjoyed going to “Greenhills”, VV Soliven and Virra Mall for PX goods. But amidst the “normalcy” as a teenager were ghost hunting and the insatiable hunger for knowledge on the unknown. I was also a voracious reader, focusing on books about UFO’s, yoga and meditation.
As I entered college, I became more and more passionate in finding out the many WHYS of life. I became an ATHEIST, questioning the reason for my being and the existence of GOD. In my search for truth, I immersed myself in books on Taoism, transcendental meditation, Buddhism, Hinduism, Sufism, the Koran and the Bible. I was seeking answers to questions I could not even understand.
One day, I was walking towards Bellarmine Hall of Ateneo with 6 big books in my arms, when I dropped them altogether in front of a tall man who seem to be a priest. He helped me pick up the books and said “Are you a Philo Major?”. To which I replied, “I’m a Communication Arts Freshman”. “I’m Fr. Bulatao … do you want me to help you develop your third eye?”. And that started it all.
I then embarked on a journey not many young people of my age then would go through. The paranormal field was something of a taboo during that time. I ventured into several planes of existence with the help of that kind Jesuit we lovingly call Fr. Bu.
I found God amidst different dimensions of life. I found God in the stillness of the night and in the quiet recesses of my mind in meditation. I found God empowering every aspect of my being and further strengthening my sixth sense. But as I found God, I was subject to a lot of difficulty and temptation.
After college, I faced a new world. I went on, furthering the “gift” on my own. The more I developed it, the more negativity came and tried to pull me back. The more my third eye opened, the more I became afraid. Because of this, I tried to be normal and chose to set aside developing that third eye.
Living a normal life, I fell in and out of love … intense in emotion … love and pain. I focused on my career … my life. I became a disc jockey, production assistant, research assistant, consumer research executive interviewer, senior researcher and a corporate planning person. Later on I managed the family businesses and did consulting for various corporations for research and permitting. I fell in love … had three beautiful children… fell out of love.
Something was lacking. I felt empty… Again I fell in love … faced challenges … felt pain … betrayed … again … the intricacies of life.
I asked myself why? I looked back and realized I suppressed and turned my back on a “gift” that should have set me free… I turned away from something that could be shared.
I then gathered all my strength to move on. I used my pain as my inspiration. I turned my negativity into a more positive energy to help myself stand up and pick up the pieces of my life.I used the betrayal to focus and love myself more. I found myself… and God once more.
I transcended time … my sixth sense became sharper than ever! This time, I liberated myself and left it all to GOD.
Thank you … you made STARGAZER who she is now.